It started with me eating some food from the market which is a normal tendency for a cheapskate like me. They didn't have any of the super scrumptious stuff so I went for one of the lesser chosen ones. Pork and some unknown vegetable. It tasted a bit weird whilst eating but, of course, you eat it anyway. Next day was a Friday and I complained about feeling funny. Come Saturday all hell broke loose. I'll spare you the details but I saw the back of one door. A lot. Obviously I slept a lot to try to recover. This led to me passing out and waking up in the darkness. So to try to fall back asleep I went to go and get some water. This meant creeping past my roommates room. I came back to my room and tried to go to sleep. Although I couldn't thanks to a load of children outside my flat screaming and playing in the street, at what must have been midnight or beyond. I was furious at the parents for being so neglectful to their children at this hour. I couldn't sleep so i decided to read a bit to calm the mind and wait for the children to go back inside. About half an hour later they were shepherded back into their respective pens. Peace and quiet, I could finally sleep. I just decided to check the time before I went back to sleep and make a mental note to tell anyone about this children who were outside playing at .... half past seven pm. My roommate wasn't even home yet! I'm putting it down to sickness that I didn't check one of my many electrical devices for the time.
This got me thinking when else have I been sick and been stupid. Although this time it wasn't my fault as such. To set the scene, in Asia they tend to overhire staff so that people have jobs, pharmacies tend to be one of these places. I went into a pharmacy to get some medicine for a runny tummy. Pharmacies in Cambodia tend to hire pretty girls for some reason. I manage to wrangle the owner's attention and call her over. The owner was an old plump lady. No-one else was now being served by any of the pretty calls working there so they all came over to listen to what was my ailment much to my annoyance. There they stood, watching, listening. There I stood with my runny tummy. So I, with my best Hugh Grant impression quietly said 'I...uh,...umm....ate...some...uh...bad....food.' Hoping this lady would clue into the situation. She clued in alright just not how I expected. She paused, focused and like a tiger before a meal, licked her lips and loudly replied 'Diarrhea?' I turned a shade of beetroot, she feasted off of my embarrassment, got her fill and then some. I rapidly paid ( I hasten to add, I've never been quicker with correct change. Not before or since.) and left the shop in a haze of embarrassment.
Anyway enjoy those, I'm finally better with some antibiotics from the doctor. The only problem is my right foot a la Christy brown; so I still can't play football, 6 months and counting. Hopefully it's better soon.
Song of the day: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DKVrVAA7E7I